Another Post From Libraryland

About an hour before closing today, I was on the reference desk and a snot-nosed theater student walked up. How do I know he was a theater student? There's a certain psychic stench. He was looking for A Doll's House by Henrik Ibsen on video. Not a problem, but I asked if there was a particular version he wanted. No. I had to scroll through the listings to see if we had a copy at HWLC on shelf. Snot-Nose got impatient and gave me a number he said was a call number that didn't resemble any call number that the library uses and I told him so, gently, I thought. He copped an attitude and said "we" didn't have a lot of time so could I just see if we had the video. I found a copy in the system and directed him to where we keep the feature videocassettes. Now, instead of being nice and submissive and helpful, I know what I should have said.

Listen. Punk. Not only have I already graduated from a theater program, but I am also a working theater professional, so I happen to know A Doll's House, and a few other plays as well. I don't know where you go to school-though with that attitude, I'm guessing DePaul-or how you treat the librarians there, but if you pulled this with the librarians I know at DePaul, they'd slap you down to a snot-smeared grease spot. You may find me forgettable, only existing to do your bidding, but I will remember your face and this incident when I have to sit through your audition, trying not to look bored. Yup, you just screwed your chances on any show I direct, stage manage, or write. And the theater world in Chicago is not that large. The videos are on the back wall.